Er...why do we have to hide his identity again? TB is Jojo. But you already know that, don't you? ;-)

Originally posted July 19, 2006
[reposted because of this]

Another one for our book...At the rate we're going, it's bound to be a bestseller. hahahahha.

Me: bon was here last night. we spent hours trying to understand why girls are always going gaga over you. i think we finally have our answers. hahahahahha

TB: Try. Unsa man inyong answers?

Me: well, the original theory was that you're inherently attracted to psycho girls, di ba? because without fail, all your girls go through this annoying melodrama cum tragedy in their lives, etc. but then, we realized that you're not attracted to a certain type of woman. rather, it's because of your personality that women transform into some sort of psychotic monster. let me explain...

TB: TB Demystified? Deconstructed?

Me: deconstructing the mythology of TB. bwahahahahahahahahaha

TB: Ataya. There is no myth.

Me: Anyway, let me explain our methodology. Our new theory is substantiated by a comparative analysis - You versus a control variable, MK.

Me: okay...u and MK are similar in the sense that u fuck around. Fucking around, in this context, is defined as sleeping with strangers, picking up women, penetrating vortices of all forms and shapes

TB: Okay, so, where's the theory there?

Me: MK is just as sexually active and just as undiscerning in fucking as you. But he has never had a woman cling to him the way your women cling to you. He doesn't go through life worrying about pregnancy scares and suicide threats. Why?

Me: The reason is simple: he has no qualms about fucking. When he meets a woman, he makes it very obvious that he's only into her for the sex. Nothing more. What you see is what you get. Pang-iyot ra gyud siya.

Me: You, on the other hand....You present urself as a friend, a gentleman, a person who cares. I don't think you consciously try to impress women. But that's just what you are; that's who you are.

TB: Ataya. Hmm. I'm listening.

Me: MK is a fucker. TB is a fucker who cares.

TB: Go on.

Me: That's why women fall for you. That's why girls would rather die than let you go. Because in losing you, they are not only losing a sexual partner. They are losing a good friend. One who listens, one who cares. Do you get my point?

Me: So in conclusion, the problem is not your women. The problem is you. hahahahahhahaha. joke.

TB: Yes, I get your point. They are the problem. They can't see through me.

Me: amaw

Me: Bitaw, perhaps you need to be more detached. Maybe you need to be a little colder...at least as far as your lovers are concerned.

TB: Detached from where?

Me: Ang-ang manguyab man gud ka. Not in the real sense of the word ha. But you become emotionally involved with your partner.

TB: Cold baya ko. Leah didn't have the kindest of words for me.

Me: hahahahahahahahahah. But still, even if u had no intentions of committing to leah, you still became good friends, di ba? She even called you her bestfriend.

Me: Well, on the other hand, Bons theorized that you looooovvveeee the attention of psycho bitches. It makes you feel needed somehow, makes you feel alive.

TB: Sayop si Bons. It's just that I feel that I can be of help.

Me: sus, superhero complex

TB: I can see through girls man gud.

Me: how come u never saw through MA?

TB: I know when a woman is troubled emotionally, or insecure, etc.

Me: on the contrary, i think you're very stupid when it comes to reading women

TB: Strong man si MA. I can see through their weaknesses rather.

Me: so? it's not your problem anymore. let them deal with it. unless ganahan ka na i-stalk na sad ka? hahahahahaha

TB: You want me to do that to Bon? To be cold? Assuming.

TB: interesting topic we have. But, I have to go now. Got a meeting at 4. Byers.

(to be continued...)