Er...why do we have to hide his identity again? TB is Jojo. But you already know that, don't you? ;-)

Originally posted July 19, 2006
[reposted because of this]

Another one for our book...At the rate we're going, it's bound to be a bestseller. hahahahha.

Me: bon was here last night. we spent hours trying to understand why girls are always going gaga over you. i think we finally have our answers. hahahahahha

TB: Try. Unsa man inyong answers?

Me: well, the original theory was that you're inherently attracted to psycho girls, di ba? because without fail, all your girls go through this annoying melodrama cum tragedy in their lives, etc. but then, we realized that you're not attracted to a certain type of woman. rather, it's because of your personality that women transform into some sort of psychotic monster. let me explain...

TB: TB Demystified? Deconstructed?

Me: deconstructing the mythology of TB. bwahahahahahahahahaha

TB: Ataya. There is no myth.

Me: Anyway, let me explain our methodology. Our new theory is substantiated by a comparative analysis - You versus a control variable, MK.

Me: okay...u and MK are similar in the sense that u fuck around. Fucking around, in this context, is defined as sleeping with strangers, picking up women, penetrating vortices of all forms and shapes

TB: Okay, so, where's the theory there?

Me: MK is just as sexually active and just as undiscerning in fucking as you. But he has never had a woman cling to him the way your women cling to you. He doesn't go through life worrying about pregnancy scares and suicide threats. Why?

Me: The reason is simple: he has no qualms about fucking. When he meets a woman, he makes it very obvious that he's only into her for the sex. Nothing more. What you see is what you get. Pang-iyot ra gyud siya.

Me: You, on the other hand....You present urself as a friend, a gentleman, a person who cares. I don't think you consciously try to impress women. But that's just what you are; that's who you are.

TB: Ataya. Hmm. I'm listening.

Me: MK is a fucker. TB is a fucker who cares.

TB: Go on.

Me: That's why women fall for you. That's why girls would rather die than let you go. Because in losing you, they are not only losing a sexual partner. They are losing a good friend. One who listens, one who cares. Do you get my point?

Me: So in conclusion, the problem is not your women. The problem is you. hahahahahhahaha. joke.

TB: Yes, I get your point. They are the problem. They can't see through me.

Me: amaw

Me: Bitaw, perhaps you need to be more detached. Maybe you need to be a little colder...at least as far as your lovers are concerned.

TB: Detached from where?

Me: Ang-ang manguyab man gud ka. Not in the real sense of the word ha. But you become emotionally involved with your partner.

TB: Cold baya ko. Leah didn't have the kindest of words for me.

Me: hahahahahahahahahah. But still, even if u had no intentions of committing to leah, you still became good friends, di ba? She even called you her bestfriend.

Me: Well, on the other hand, Bons theorized that you looooovvveeee the attention of psycho bitches. It makes you feel needed somehow, makes you feel alive.

TB: Sayop si Bons. It's just that I feel that I can be of help.

Me: sus, superhero complex

TB: I can see through girls man gud.

Me: how come u never saw through MA?

TB: I know when a woman is troubled emotionally, or insecure, etc.

Me: on the contrary, i think you're very stupid when it comes to reading women

TB: Strong man si MA. I can see through their weaknesses rather.

Me: so? it's not your problem anymore. let them deal with it. unless ganahan ka na i-stalk na sad ka? hahahahahaha

TB: You want me to do that to Bon? To be cold? Assuming.

TB: interesting topic we have. But, I have to go now. Got a meeting at 4. Byers.

(to be continued...)

Originally posted on June 5, 2006.
[reposted because of this]

It' TB time again. I love quoting TB. He's such a character, isn't he?
(note: certain parts edited or deleted for obvious reasons)

TB: I want to post the mushy letters I made for MA during those times nga naglisod ko sa akong feelings kay uyab na sila ni RH.

TB: Shit, makahilak ko reading it. I never actually got to give it to her. I was about to, but I got back my senses right on time. Thank god. Nawala nalang pud after.

Me: What? You're probably the most pathetic person I've met!

TB: Pathetic? Not really. Let's just say stuck. I was the most stuck person.

TB: I have this MA box. I won't dare open it just to get that letter. It might open up old feelings. YUCKKKKK

Me: Seriously? You have an MA box? Seriously?!?!?!?!?

TB: Why that reaction? No, Yan. Just a baul.

Me: What's inside the box?

TB: Stuff that she gave me. Letters, notes, books, prayers, beads, daghan.

Me: I sure hope that the box is a metaphor. Coz if you actually do have an MA box, God, there's nothing I or anyone can do anymore. You're as good as gone.

TB: Ataya. I don't actually have a box. Nagkalat lang sila sa akong old stuff. God, No, Yan. I don't have a box. Unsay siya importante sa akong kinabuhi? Har, har.

Me: Wait, wait, wait...she gave you letters?

TB: Not the long & winding ones. Notes. Just notes.

Me: What? Let's see them!

TB: Ataya. I won't subject her to ridicule. I owe her that.

TB: Oh, & prayers. A prayer, actually. You want the prayer?

Me: Hala sige para masunog tang tanan

TB: Pero bato naman ko ron.

Me: Hahahaha. You're the most emotional guy I know. You can never be bato.

TB: I guess burning my MA box would be a good start, noh? What do you think, psychologist?

Me: We could sift through all your extra baggage together.

TB: Ataya. And analyze? Make a narrative? Hmm. Why not?

Me: Er...

TB: Make a narrative about how not to fall in love? Ang background music dayon kay "ako'y may natutunan sa aking karanasan, mali ang magmahal sa isang kaibigan...."

Me: How not to fall in love? But being in love is a fucking great feeling! It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all...you know, all that crap, all that jazz. (Playing devil's advocate)

TB: Ah, crap. It's better to have loved and fucked. But, it is even better to not have loved but fucked just the same.

(response censored for excessive profanity...gag, gag, gag)

(later...in another part of the galaxy...)

TB: Pare, tama ba yun? Better to have loved and lost daw..... etc.

Me: "It's better to have loved and fucked. But, it is even better to not have loved but fucked just the same." Do you agree?

BD: Casual sex is always better, pare. I learned it at a later age nalang pare na sex without commitment is better than anything else. Pero it's just me, pare. Hehehehe.

TB: It definitely is better. Welcome to the club. Do we have to form an association or something?

Me: Na hala. Just as long as you don't contract a disease or anything.

TB: Wala may STD si D. Gidugo lang, ok?

(long pause)

TB: Aw, dili ko sure.

(short pause)

TB: Her bloody efflorence and our encounter confabulates me no end

(shocked silence)

Me: You amaze me! Grabe!

TB: I've tested the limits of my humanity so, I guess, my treshold for a perversion is high

(end. cue credits. cue psycho sound track.)



Sigh. TB, oh, TB. What will we do with you?

TB's reaction to "10 Reasons Why I Love My Friends". Originally posted May 20, 2006:
[reposted because of this]

Note: Please read this first. As for the identity of this person, itago natin sya sa pangalang TB (B stands for boy, T stands for something else - hint: a 3 letter word that literally means crap). Those who know TB have a pretty good idea who MS and MP (P stands for Psycho) are.

TB: The "passionate sexual beings" is a bit out of line. The way you put it, it would seem that MS has no place in our circle of friends.

Me: I was referring to the inner circle.

TB: Ngek. Okay, I agree on the passionate sexual beings. Murag way lugar si MS.

Me: Actually, I didn't even remember that she's in our circle. No offense.

TB: Ok, the inner-inner. The inner core.

Me: Ok, fine, the inner core. That part of her you want to penetrate, right?

TB: Taya. Ok fine. She's not only in my circle but in every shape imaginable - the heart most especially. Arrgh! Yes, I want to commune with her soul. Whatever that means.

Me: Kaluod nimo! Grabe! I can see that you've moved on all right

TB: By the way, I have a lunch date with the very married MP later. I'm afraid we'll end up eating each other for lunch.

Me: hala ka! bantay ha, pwede raba mupatay ang bana. Do u know that a husband can't be convicted if he kills his wife's lover?

TB: Ok lang mamatay basta namatay nga naka jer2x. Worthy cause, right?

Me: God, you're pathetic!

TB: He has to prove that I'm her lover first.

Me: I can be a witness for the defense. hahahahahahah

TB: I've moved on Yan. MS is history. You know, it's good to make fun of our past (what's the term?) trivialities.

Me: Absurdities, rather.

TB: Yes, absurdities.

It's been a long time since I did this. I so love quoting our beloved TB. hehehe...

Jojo: Naa koy ka cyber Yan.

Ako: taya gud

Ako: si gen?

Ako: eheheheheheh

Jojo: Don't try to open my cam. I'm naked.

Ako: ewwwwww

Ako: kinsa man na? si maldivian girl?

Jojo: Nope. Philippines.

Jojo: Di ta ka blame. Layo man gud. The situation calls for innovative strategies.

Ako: kujaw! anyone i know?

Jojo: Gotta go Yan. Good night.